Aarrrrg

(this was written last week. I just forgot to post it until today. :D )

I am soo frustrated right now. I'm really not feeling good. I really want to be standing up and moving, but when I do I just feel worse. I am so silly. I can't stand sitting down for more then 15 minutes. so it's a real problem when I'm sick. Mom keeps telling me that I should do my math, But my brain just doesn't want to work today. I don't know what to do. I've pretty much been in my room all day reading. It's driving my mom nuts cuz she really wants me to be doing something worth while, like school. But I just can't do that today! I'm also really upset because I have a piano lesson tomorrow afternoon and I am sooo not ready. I didn't practice yesterday because it was just so beautiful out side, I didn't want to be doing anything inside. So now I'm in trouble. It's just crazy. I'm pretty frustrated with life right now. I don't know what to do.
One of the reasons I'm upset because I really don't like my new piano teacher. She's not a bad person. she's nice.. I think I don't like it because we're not friends or kindred spirits or anything. The last two teachers I've had were people I really loved and could be around for a whole hour. I would feel comfortable talking to them about my day and what is going on with my family. When I talk to Chelle about my family I get kind of nervous because I get the impression that she doesn't like kids very much. one time I came in to my lesson and one of my pieces had been drawn on with a pen by my little brother. she looked at it and made some remark about how destructive little kids are. It made me kind of mad because I really love my siblings and I didn't care if they wrote on my music. And dude, I could still read the music, so why does it matter. But in any case, maybe that's not it. Maybe I don't like her because I don't WANT to like her. See, we know someone else there who also teaches piano. And when we first signed up we asked to have her teach me. Latter, the teacher called us and told us that she had too many students and couldn't take me on. So I got pretty upset. But I figured that God had something in mind and maybe the different teacher that I was going to get was even better then our friend. So on my first lesson, I walked in expecting to have a great time and to really get along with her really well, and I walked out feeling really depressed. Nothing had clicked like I thought it would. And ever since then I've been trying to figure out why it didn't. I still believe that God has something wonderful in mind, but I'm kind of getting inpatient.
Another thing is, is that I don't know how much I want to play the piano. I mean, I LOVE playing it, don't get me wrong, I just don't know if I actually want to do it for life. Clara wants to play the flute for life. She wants to become big and famous and make CD's and stuff. I'm not sure if I want to do that. If I wanted to become big and famous, I would much rather be an actress. There is a BIG difference between the joy that I get from being on stage, and the joy I get from playing piano. And I just like acting better. or, I think I do. I don't know. I love them both so much. I just seem to be happier when I'm on stage. Ugh. it's all really confusing. I'm not sure what to think. I probably shouldn't worry about it and just leave it in God's hands. It just doesn't seem right to be spending a tun of money on one thing, when I could be spending it on something that I want to do more and I enjoy more. *sigh*
So yeah. that's my rant for the next few months. it probably doesn't make any sense to anyone but me, but that's ok. :)
I better get going.

~Cecilia

I'm super girl!

Yesterday was a really really really long day. My mom woke me up at 6:00 and asked me if I wanted to go to mass with her at 6:30. My first thought was "uuuugh it's sooo early. my bed is soo worm. there is no way." And then a second latter I was on my feet getting dressed. God pretty much pushed me out of bed.
The mass was beautiful. There were actually a lot of people there which I didn't expect. It was nice just to be at mass with my mom. Even if I did have to get out of my nice worm bed and walk in to freezing cold weather to do it. :) I'm glad I got to do that.
And as it turned out, it would have been a very bad thing if I went to a latter mass. cuz right after we got home and had breakfast, me and my dad drove to the middle of no where and chopped wood. well, he chopped the wood, I staked it all in the car. but it wasn't bad. I actually had fun. it just took FOREVER. we were out for about four hours, but it felt like a whole day. But now we have lot's of wood for the winter. So all is good.
When I got home I hopped in the shower and then pretty much conked out. except I never did get to sleep...
Everybody else hadn't gone to mass yet, so they left me with David and told me to make dinner. the good thing was that they told me what to make and gave me a recipe. I wouldn't have been to happy if they didn't. Not like I was very happy that they had me make dinner in the first place... I was rather annoyed. but it turned out ok. David was awesome. he was being very sweet and played by him self for most of the time they were gone. So that made me VERY happy. I turned on my music and made dinner which didn't turn out too badly. (oh and by the way, my mom left for her uncles funeral, so that's why she wasn't at home with me. )
So yeah. it was just a really long day. Not a bad one, just long.
I'm super girl.

Oh, and one more thing..

I forgot to put this in the last post... :)

A walk in the park

Yesterday me and my older sisters took a walk around the neighborhood to take pictures of fall. it was a perfectly beautiful day out. Everything was just gorgeous. we took a TUN of pictures. :) Here are just a few.

My foot.... :)

My lovely sisters




That's me and Clara. I'm the one who's not wearing a hat. I think I was laughing....

God is so wonderful. :) I'm probably going to be posting a lot of pictures soon. I've been going crazy with the camera lately. haha.
Oh! by the way, It's my parents 20th anniversary today! YAY!!! :D I'm going to go make a cake now... :)

Name's and other things

For the past few months, my dad has been trying to get me to start spelling my nick name ceci, instead of just CC. He says that now that I'm older, it would look better. But I don't know. I've always kind of thought that spelling it CC kind of showed off my character. I am very childish most of the time. I am a goof ball. I can be very shy, but only for a minute. After I break out of my shell, I can be very wild and crazy. I laugh almost all the time. Cc is just a very simple name and I like it like that. I like to think of my self as simple. And even if I'm not, it's a nice reminder to keep simple. So I'm not sure if I should change it or not. We shall see. :P

Not a lot has been going on with me. I'm gonna go to Green Bluff with my cousins tomorrow. I'm pretty excited about that. It's a pretty annual thing. We pick out pumpkins, go through the corn maze, get some yummy treats, all that jazz. It's really fun. I really like to hang out with my cousins. There kind of the close siblings that I don't have. I've always wanted to have a sibling that is close to me in age, and thats what my cousins are. one is one year older then me, and the other is one year younger. I'm smack in the middle! :) It's really cool. I love them a lot. I used to go over to their house all the time and have sleep overs when I was younger. Sometimes I spend New Years with them. It's awesome. So yeah. that's what I will be doing this weekend. not a lot other then that. :P
I better go do some school. Blaah.

Another day with Cecilia

I pretty much just woke up. My brain isn't working fully. But I don't really care. I'm in a very good mood today. I'm thankful for everything. The sun is just coming up and I can see it through my bedroom window. This week has just been lovely. On Sunday it was wonderfully rainy. perfect for curling up in a sweater and reading a good book. And we even got to go to confession ( I LOVE that sacrament. Awesome stuff. :D ) It was a very good day.
Yesterday I was in the oddest mood! I was incredibly hyper. It probably drove my family nuts, but it made me happy! I did my school, (or most of it) and I even made dinner. I had a lot of fun with that. we need to pick all the veggies in the garden before it freezes, so I pretty much picked a bunch of stuff and threw them in a pot of pasta with some sort of sauce. it was delightful. I really like making dinner. or, I do once I get started on it. before I kind of dread it. But I think thats normal. :)
The only thing that is making me sad right now, is that I haven't been to any kind of social event in a really long time. I miss my friends a lot. By best friend goes to high school and doesn't have a lot of time to chat with me. Blaaah. School is such a pain! :)

I got my book Inkdeath today!!! I am SOOO Happy. I have to finish the other book I'm reading right now before I start it tho. :P I'm really excited.
Well, I guess I better get up and start my day. :D

WAYIN

You can't be in London for long without going to the zoo. There are some people who begin the Zoo at the beginning, called WAYIN, and walk as quickly as they can past every cage until they get to the called WAYOUT, but the nicest people go straight to the animal they love the most, and stay there. So when Christopher Robin goes to the Zoo, he goes where the Polar bears are, and he whispers something to the third keeper from the left, and the doors are unlocked, and we wander through dark passages and up steep stairs until at last we come to the special cage, and the cage is open, and out trots something brown and furry, and with a happy cry of "Oh, Bear!" Christopher Robin rushes into its arms. Now this bear's name is Winnie, which shows what a good name for bears it is, but the funny thing is that we can't remember whether Winnie is called after Pooh, or Pooh after Winnie. we did know once, but we have forgotten.....
- A. A. Milne

One of my favorites. I love A. A. Milne.